How To Build Self Esteem After Rejection

Building self esteem using these tools will restore health & wellness. How to use feelings to restore self worth.

How to build self esteem after rejection takes pre-planning before that event takes place. Rejection comes in many forms sometimes with little or no warning that can deeply affect self confidence and severely damage self respect unless preparations are in place.

Steps to know about self esteem

Little can be done to actually prepare for the devastation of self-worth yet just being aware can be a step in the right direction. Shock still sets in after rejection, but then reality will be known that happiness can and will return with feelings of self confidence restored. Having the beliefs that the healthy self can and will be returning adds to esteem building.

Relationships that lead back to self confidence and ones to avoid

Focusing on the positive, limit the negative feelings an individual has in any relationship.  Attitude has a huge impact on having a clear vision of a way to a healthy self once again. Feelings of despair only breed low self esteem and also hinder the healing as well. Surrounding oneself with healthy and beneficial supportive people can be a distraction if only for short times while you are with them, but have a longer lasting effect as words and actions are recalled to lead toward good self esteem paths. At least for a short time research recommend limiting contact with people with low self esteem or condemning words.

Timeline for feelings of doubt to feel good once more and who should be included

Stuffing feelings are harmful to health & wellness so let the annoyance and sadness be vented in proper places. Unloading your most vulnerable times might be best given to professionals rather than friends or relatives. Those important people in your life already share the pain of your injured self esteem so talking without monitoring your statements first will not help you or them. If you must, weigh and limit the pain of your self worth with people you care the most about in life.

Directives to happiness

If you determine to solicit professional counseling you might very well be given facts of how to rebuild high self esteem using specific techniques in these ways.

1.  Don't play the blame game. Partnerships, relationships and promises that were once sacred have been breached. When you ask if blaming will change the outcome, the answer will be no, so be aware and don't blame lack of self esteem on anyone or yourself.

2.  Collect some 3X5 cards and anytime you think of negatives, replace it with a written positive on the card to refer back to when low self esteem creeps back in your life.

3.  List as many good attributes you possess as you can place on the laptop, notebook or writing pad. Add to them anytime you think of your wonderful feelings, relationship characteristics or great points about yourself.

4.  Devote yourself to recognizing high self esteem. Start one day by telling yourself one good thing three times a day. Next day increase it by 2 and so on with each day building that low self esteem back to where you feel good about yourself.

5.  Keep track of your goals you have accomplished the ways you have discovered to build self esteem after rejection. Set some new goals after each goal has been met. 

6.  Rediscover the good feelings of you by revisiting hobbies or activities you enjoy doing.

7.  Exercise your low self esteem away with a walk, bicycle ride, a swim or other body exercises.

8.  Dress the part of successful accomplishments of self respect building by wearing clothing that gives you a boost. Use facial expressions that make you feel good too.

9.  Give a feel good compliment to someone who deserves your accolade. Meaningful compliments to others will give you self worth feelings when you view the results you give out. 

10. Forgive the person who rejected you, but more importantly forgive yourself so there is room for building your self esteem after rejection.

Photograph is Minnesota fuschia depicting beautiful new growth when self esteem is restored. Courtesy Roberta Baxter


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